Building Community, Facing Fear, and Learning to Ask for Help
I opened Black Dagger Hair almost two years ago, and on February 15th, we’ll celebrate our two-year anniversary! It’s been an absolute whirlwind of excitement—and, well, a lot of fear too. I’ve poured a lot of money into my business, not to mention my blood, sweat, tears, and soul. My salon is a reflection of me in every sense.
I don’t have a degree, let alone a business degree. Everything has been trial and error, guided mostly by intuition. I know the next few years will determine whether my business survives long-term.
Right now, my loudest and most persistent fear is that the new government administration will tank the economy, and my fragile, still-growing business won’t make it. Hairstylists and salons rely on people’s disposable income. Personally, I work with a ton of “normal” folks—hardworking, everyday people. Most of my clients aren’t wealthy, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. But if our already expensive daily lives get even more expensive, it will absolutely impact the salon industry—and my business.
Last week, I was talking to my therapist about this. I told her about all the ways I’m building community at the shop and how I try to support my clients and the people around me. I explained that I’d be devastated if I couldn’t continue doing what I do for the LGBTQIA+ community. On top of that, the space I’ve created helps my coworkers keep a roof over their heads and food on the table.
She listened, then looked me straight in the eye and said, “Sarah, you’re also part of the community you’ve built.”
That hit me square between the eyes! I literally responded, “Oh!?”
It felt good to realize that, but it was also scary. It means that if I ever need help, I’ll have to ask my community for it—which is terrifying for me. It also means I’ll have to rely on others. Like, damn! Those are 2 things I’m really not great at.
Community is powerful. It’s what so many of us are striving for, especially as we brace for tough times ahead. But if we truly want to have community and use it, we have to face the hard, uncomfortable parts too—like accepting help and asking for it when we need it.
At the end of the day, community isn’t just about giving—it’s about receiving, too. We’re all out here trying to make it, and none of us can do it alone. So, here’s to leaning on each other when we need to, even when it’s uncomfortable. Here’s to building something that lasts, together.
Sarah
